I just dont know whats going on with this band this week.. I have had a couple of very awkward PB episodes of late.. And Nola's blog reminded me that I should share the goriness with you all.
I was at work at the shop, and had my nan with me, she was bagging lollies (which I should have been doing), but instead I made lunch for us.. (the shop has a handy lil kitchen out the back) So I grilled up a chicken thigh fillet each for us, and a lovely big serve of my FAVOURITE salad on our plates.. I was mumbling on about how much of the salad I could eat, and that it really chews up to nothing, and that if I didnt put the crunchy noodles in it, I would probably have problems, because the noodles remind me to chew chew chew... Blah blah blah... So half way through our meal, I get that all too familiar feeling, the tightness, the sweats, the panic, my arms go straight up in the air, and my nan looks at me like I have lost the plot. I stand up and start pacing back and forth behind the counter, and back through the kitchen... This time I know for sure that the food is gonna come back up... Then, it happened... Ding fuckin dong goes the shops entry bell, a customer comes in... I have no choice but to suck it up and serve.. luckily the guy just wanted his smokes and left... I then raced out back again leaning over a bucket (one that used to be filled with organic yogurt) and started dry reaching.. this mongrel bit of food was really stuck, coz the more I retched the more it seemed to lodge itself.. Nan was saying that I should try drinking something.. I said in between gassy burps that it might make it worse..I was sliming majorly by now, and then ringa-ding-dong, another customer.. DAMMIT!!! The guy wanted a pie... (not so bad, at least that's one less in the oven to temp me later)... I said goodbye with a massive hiccup, he could sense I wasnt feeling real good, maybe the hiccup confirmed in his mind that I was drinking alcoholic beverages out back.. Oh, but that was not the case..
Once again, I leant over the bucket and finaly, some slimey sloppy action... instant relief.. I wiped the tears from my eyes, washed my mouth out, and came back to sit with nan.. Who kindly offered to finish my chicken if I didnt want it.. LOL... why the hell would I want it??? But more to the point, why the hell would she want it?? I had just chucked my guts up, and she still wants to eat... Let me just say.. My nan loves her tucker...Needless to say, I am now very careful when I eat at work..
This week end, after getting up at 4:30am to go and open the shop, I wasnt feeling much like making anything for lunch when I finished work at 12.. So when I got home, we jumped back in the car, and headed out to get pizza and find somewhere nice to sit..Got the pizza on a "classic crust"... not too thick, not too thin... and found a nice spot in the sun at the beach. I got through the first piece, chewing carefully, and started on the second... and here it goes again.. the pain, the look of food making me feel even sicker.. then just when I go to get up to have a yak, it clears... Thank god for that..
The following day (sunday) another lazy day for Nene, we got fish and chips and took it to the beach for a picnic.. Ayisha loves the whole blanket on the ground style of eating.. and before I go on, I know my week end eating plan has been well and truely up to shit.. but... so what?? It's my birthday week.. LOL... We sit, and I break of some fish from a big piece of flake.. Have no problem with it, then a few chips, no problems... Then I break another piece of fish and top it with some coleslaw, down it goes, then... the almighty pain that is dictating my fucking eating habits... Hubby asks me to pur him a drink, which I usually would do as soon as the words were out of his mouth, but I just passed him the bag with the plastic cups and bottle of drink in it, and got up and took off for privacy behind my car. Montel and hubby look on in concern, and Ayisha is right up behind me, laughing all the way because it's mummys turn to vomit.. (she was sick a few days ago, and i was holding the bowl for her) I am hunched over, waiting for this inevitable event to be over, then a car comes down the hill into the area where we are, so I stand and lean over the back of my car, hiding my face... the car is gone, then 1,2,3 heave... out it comes.. I am motioning for Ayisha to get away, waving my arms at her.. but she just stands back, making yukky faces at the goop i just spat at the ground, and the strings of slime still hanging from my mouth.. Montel comes and pats me on the back, and asks if he can have a look too...
Please tell me, What is so amusing about vomit, poo, snot, wee, farts and all things horrible to kids??? After composing myself, and gathering up our picnic, we were in the car, I said to hubby that perhaps it was my body's way of saying "Stop eating SHIT FOOD!"
So, this friday will be my 30th birthday, and I had a goal to be down to 120kg by then... to be honest, I dont think that I will be.. but.. with all the crap I have been eating, I know why.. I have got a fill appointment on wednesday, and am considering having my fill taken out for the week end, just so I can go rank.. but ... i really dont want to undo what I have acheived so far, so I might just go for the check up and weigh in, and leave my fill as it is.. as it is, I think the alchol binging will do enough damage.. I just know I wont be eating scones as hangover food..